David : The long goodbye by Jim Mortram

Meeting regularly, David and I, in early 2013 began working upon the first instalment of an ongoing series of stories about his life with blindness. The challenging new day to day routines, learning routes into town with his stick or following behind his mother, Eugene.

Meeting regularly, David and I, in early 2013 began working upon the first instalment of an ongoing series of stories about his life with blindness. The challenging new day to day routines, learning routes into town with his stick or following behind his mother, Eugene.

Together, we focussed upon how he was coping with the isolation, depression, the navigation of the local streets where bodiless voices surrounded him, a new world of unseen whispers, as though falling and falling through a snowstorm of disembodied ghosts, the many new terrors and harsh realities of David’s learning to live blinded.

JAM_1494_Web_TEST-901x600

“The world, well, I knew it was out there but I didn’t feel a part of it, I felt I was no longer a part of the world. You sort of feel like you’re a ghost and you’re like on the far side of the universe and perhaps the world no longer exists or perhaps, like, I’m gone, I’m dead and maybe I’m some kind of spirit and I’m stuck in some parallel purgatory. That’s how it’s felt ever since I’ve been blind”

During the spring and early summer of 2013 and thanks wholly to Mike Hartley who suggested the site, HopeMob was used to fund raise a SARA scanning device for David. The scanner is a machine that enables a blind person to scan the printed word and convert it to audio, letters, newspapers, bills and books.

The fundraising proved to be a success, donations and support coming from all over the world, the money raised in four of the allocated 40 days, social media was used as the singular tool to enable the fundraising, the people that use it responsible for the donations.

JAM_3344_Web-901x600
David, sat in his kitchen waiting for the SARA to be turned on for the very first time.

“There’s nothing the same, if I’d been able to see a little after the accident I might have been able to access things but I can’t. I’m so cut off from the world, it’s just like being a ghost floating through the world and the only time you know you’re not a ghost is if you bang into something and it hurts and then you know you’re real as the pain feels real.”

JAM_3382_Web-901x600
David, placing the first book to be scanned.

JAM_3412_Web-902x600
Waiting for the first typed words to be translated to audio.

“When you don’t see anything at all, all there is, is black, it’s a terrible situation as you forget what things are, like colours, you begin to forget them. When you dream, though, you can see them, it’s daylight in my dreams but once I wake up, it’s gone.”

JAM_3372_web-901x600
David, hearing a page from one of his favourite books for the very first time.

“Having stories read out to me, I can visualise things in my mind and get new input. I can read books I have never read before, I feel like a person again.”

JAM_0363_web-895x600
David, putting his walking shoes on, his mother, Eugene, waits, struggling with severe back pain, behind him.

“Mother just kept getting worse during the summertime because she had a lot more pain in her back and in her hip and she couldn’t get about much, when she did she had to lean on her shopping trolley, as far back as January 2012 she’d been like that really. She used to make it into town about once a week and I’d go with her and hold onto the belt of her coat, carry the shopping in my left hand so she did not have to push that weight in her trolley. Then she began to have falls.”

“Her legs got weaker, whether that was because she had to keep laying down because of the pain I don’t know. I guess from this time I really became mother’s carer. During November she had four falls in the course of about a fortnight. She got going again though, she used to just come down in the mornings for about an hour, prepare one or two things for later then she would go back upstairs and get into her bed and cover herself up with coats and clothes to keep warm till about dinnertime.”

JAM_0537_Web-901x600
David holding on to the belt of his mother’s coat as they embark on the walk into town.

JAM_0511_Web-904x600
David carries a bag of cut-price half-oranges that his mother buys at the local market.

JAM_0442_Web-912x600
Supermarket.

JAM_0547_web-901x600
Eugene, tired after the walk into town putting away her shopping trolley.

“It was a Friday evening I think and we were in the front room and mother was sitting in this high chair that I’m sitting in now, she would put a blanket over her feet and legs to try and keep warm and she would go up to bed around 8pm because the pain would get too much sat up in a chair, so around 8 she would go up to bed and she got up and went to throw the blanket over the back of the chair to keep it tidy, she swung and the momentum of doing this overbalanced her and she went over backwards and hit her head, I think, on the bookcase, that’s where she told me she’d hit her head.”

“I pulled her up and I was surprised at how light she was as I just held her hand and pulled her straight up, I was so surprised at how light she had got. She went off to bed and she didn’t seem any worse than she had been but I wondered to myself what she would be like the next morning as often you’re worse the next day than you are that moment you actually hurt yourself.”

JAM_6598_Web-786x1200
David, sat in his mother’s chair.

“We got through the weekend and she was a bit stiffer than usual on the Saturday but she was still sort of getting about the house. Then on the Sunday after she had gone up to bed, she’d gone up around half past 8 and this must have been half past 11 I heard this almighty crash and I had a feeling it was her, that she must of had a fall and I thought to myself “What am I going to find?.” so I made my way upstairs and called out and mother said “I’m in the bathroom, I’ve fallen over backwards, I’m laying in the bathroom.”

“I couldn’t get into the bathroom to get her up as she was laying behind the door but she managed somehow to get herself up from the door so I was able to reach through the gap in the doorway and pull her through and up into her bed. After that, she was able to come down in the mornings but she was much worse.”

“About the middle of that week, in the morning after she would usually have gotten up, she was still in bed and from then on she didn’t get up any more. She told me to go up to the doctors surgery and tell the doctor. I managed to get up there but when I arrived the inner doors were locked and fortunately another person that wanted to see the doctor was there and they told me that there was a sign on the door saying the doors were locked until 2pm due to training, so there was no one there and I had to come back home.”

“The next morning I headed up there again at around 9am and made an appointment and the doctor didn’t come out till after he had finished his surgery, so that would have been about one o’clock and after he’d had a look at her said that mother would have to be admitted to hospital but they might not come out for some time because of emergencies. I think they showed up at around a quarter to 6 or 7pm and they took her into the ambulance and up to hospital.”

D7K_5808_Web-906x600
Having lived with is mother his entire life, David eats alone for the first time.

D7K_5799_Web-916x600
David, consumed with worry before visiting his mother in hospital.

“I managed to get a lift up to visit and mother said “I don’t want to be in this place, I want to come home.” and I said “Yes, I know, you to told me to tell the doctors.” and she said “I didn’t know I’d end up in here!.” and I promised to try and do my best to get her back home. She said “It’s a horrible place here, you should never have done what I told you to do!, you should have defied me and not gone!.” but when I walked to the doctors with my cane I had no idea the doctor would decide she had to go to hospital you see?. I didn’t know what else to do. I asked mother if she had been x-rayed but she told me “No.” so whether she did break anything when she fell god only knows as I don’t and I never did find out.”

“The hospital said that she had got malnourished because she had only been eating small amounts. I’d been going into town with my long walking cane to get food for her for months, ready meals but she began to only eat half in the day and I would warm up the rest and she would have that in the evening. I used to say to her that was not very much, that she was on half rations and that she should eat more.”

“A few days later I managed to speak with mother on the phone and she sounded a little better, more interested in things, asking after me and how I was managing on my own and we talked for a few minutes. That was the last time that we really had a conversation that was a proper conversation. When we said goodnight on the phone she said “Goodbye, my darling.” and I said “Goodbye, mum.” and I said “I love you.” and she said “Yes, I know you do.”

JAM_6232_Web-922x600
David visits his mother, Eugene in hospital.

“Then the next day the hospital called again and said that mother had a chest infection and she was not very well at all and the consultant had put her on a drip of antibiotics. The day before she had been picking up and then this came on in a matter of hours. A day later a woman doctor phoned up and said about this chest infection and now also an urinary infection. They kept her on a drip and this all went on for a few more days.”

“We’re going to take her off the drip and not do anything more for her.”, the consultant decided this. The woman on the phone asked me how I felt about this and I said “Well, how do you think I feel about it?, not very good, do I!.” I wanted them to put her on a drip and give her a few more days but they had decided not to after running all these tests but I just didn’t know what was going on.”

“I said to the people on the telephone that were calling from the hospital how hard all this was because I couldn’t see. I felt helpless as I was stuck at home and I wanted to visit but I couldn’t get up there to visit, I didn’t know what buses to take or where to walk, these are all routes I’d never learned. I said all this to them and they told me it wouldn’t make any difference to things even if I could get up there. I told them to tell the consultant how I felt, that I would like them to give her a drip again. I’d ring them up everyday and ask how she was and they would tell me no change and I’d feel like such a heel as I couldn’t get up there.”

JAM_6228_Web-905x600
David talks to his mother as she lays, semi conscious in her hospital bed.

“Anyway, I got Jim to take me up, we went up together on the bus, he came and took me up there to the hospital and I sort of tried to talk with mother, well, you couldn’t really properly talk with her as she was delirious as now she had this infection in her kidneys and once your kidneys are not functioning right you get all disorientated but she must have known something as my hands had got cold outside and she suddenly said “That’s one thing… your hands are cold.” so she knew that and I said “Yes, it is cold mum.” so she must have known that. After a few minutes she spoke again and said my name “David.” so she must have know that it was me but after that she didn’t say anything else.”

“We went up again and she was much worse, unresponsive in a very deep sleep, semi conscious but I spoke to her, I told her what a wonderful mother she was. I’m pretty sure she could hear me. That was the last time I ever saw her because she got through that night but died the next night. I was at home sat up and the telephone rang and I thought to myself “Oh, god almighty… I bet I know what this is.”

D7K_5845_Web2-928x600
Saying goodbye for the final time.

“I’d been hoping, you see, for some sort of a miracle but it was the hospital calling and they left a message on the answer phone saying that they had some bad news and that mother had passed away, the nurses had gone in to check on her and noticed that her breathing had got very shallow so they stayed there with her and held her hand, so at least she was not all alone when she did die.”

JAM_0646jh-901x600
David.

“All this has been made worse in that, when you lose your sight you already down about that and then you have to deal with everything, losing someone… it makes it so dark, no daylight, so nothing brightens up, it’s always dark. It’s dreadful really. It’s as though I am in a box, a prison cell, all the time and I can’t escape. I lost my sight, I never lost my capacity to feel or to reason so I feel all these emotions just as I always would have before the accident, just now… I feel like I’m coping very badly as the blindness, the depression it never changes. I have been using the SARA a little more now though, it’s like a parole really, a few moments out of my prison cell. Mother used to like me having it on whilst I listened to my books so, now she’s gone I kind of feel it’s not too disrespectful to have it on as she used to like it reading the books too.”

[Official Website]

More Stories

AImagine: the new Era of making Art ?

AImagine: the new Era of making Art ?

We are experiencing a turning point; indeed, I would say a revolution in the artistic disciplines, especially those relating to visual art; it is the beginning of a new Era in which the current paradigms will no longer be valid, in which reality will be questioned or modified through alternative realities.
Terra Mater – Ode to My Family  by Marco Castelli

Terra Mater – Ode to My Family by Marco Castelli

Words are not inherently suitable to embrace any even blurred concept of time, and beside all speech being made nowadays around the sense of family, its true nature belongs to the undetectable trace we leave through centuries, and to our relationship with time itself.
The magical hidden world by Georgi Georgiev

The magical hidden world by Georgi Georgiev

The magical hidden world project was selected and published in our print edition 23. These photos are one of my personal best from the past few years. Most of them are from one place where I spend every spare moment to take photos.

Portrait Photography Awards

We invite you to participate in the first edition
of the Portrait Photography Awards. We are looking
for the best portrait for this year, 2023.

Our call is open to any artistic interpretation of portrait photography.

DEADLINE | FRIDAY, MARCH 31, 2023

PHOTO BY © JOSE GIRL
Sleepless by Rebecca Sexton Larson

Sleepless by Rebecca Sexton Larson

Growing up I always had an affinity with the night. It was when I did my most productive work, alone in my bedroom free from noise and distractions. I would find comfort in the subdued light and quiet stillness, losing a sense of time and being absorbed in the moment of creating art.
Pride and prejudice by Renata Dutrée

Pride and prejudice by Renata Dutrée

Pride and prejudice project was selected and published in our print edition 23. This ongoing series of studio portraits of young men is intended to challenge the viewer with social constructs that are centered around masculinity and femininity. Gender bias, gender roles and stereotypes can affect everyone negatively.
Gender identity; Lexi by Timothi Jane Graham

Gender identity; Lexi by Timothi Jane Graham

I first met Lexi at the beginning of her medical gender affirmation journey in December 2020. At 58 years old, she had identified and lived as a woman for decades behind closed doors. She was born and raised in Ecuador where the LGBTQ community faces intense discrimination which often ends in violence.

Featured Stories

Photochemistry : Pears in the afternoon by Karoline Schneider

Photochemistry : Pears in the afternoon by Karoline Schneider

Originally a fine artist, I swapped my brushes for a camera and my colours for photochemistry. That’s how the ‘paintings’ that I never painted emerged.
Under the sign of the rat; Roger the Rat by Roger Ballen

Under the sign of the rat; Roger the Rat by Roger Ballen

Surreal, refined, disturbing: Roger Ballen has made a name for himself with his special eye for what is usually considered minor or outside, yet is nevertheless profound and touching.
Northern Siberia; Like Last Year’s Snow by Oded Wagenstein

Northern Siberia; Like Last Year’s Snow by Oded Wagenstein

In the remote village of Yar-Sale in Northern Siberia live a group of elderly women. They were once part of a nomadic community of reindeer herders.
Paul Eis ; The architecture photographer

Paul Eis ; The architecture photographer

In Paul Eis' Instagram project, he gathers images of buildings from mainly Berlin, Hamburg and some other cities, which are cut of their original context and reworked with bright colors.
The exposed city by Sevil Alkan

The exposed city by Sevil Alkan

Taking photography by mobile phones created a new trend by changing the border and direction of the photography
Grabarka by Xavier Ferrer Chust

Grabarka by Xavier Ferrer Chust

This is the most important location of Orthodox worship in Poland. Every year Grabarka is visited by more than 10,000 pilgrims. The Holy Mount Grabarka is an important place for pilgrimages by Orthodox believers in Poland
https://www.dodho.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/01/bannerpr.jpg

We invite you to participate in the first edition of the Portrait Photography Awards. Our call is open to any artistic interpretation of portrait photography.

https://www.dodho.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/BAnImage.jpg

ImageRights provides intelligent image search and copyright enforcement services to photo agencies and professional photographers worldwide.

https://www.dodho.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/09/mono2022.jpg

The best 100 images along with the winning images published in the yearly book “Monochromatic – Best Photographers of 2022”

https://www.dodho.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/12/banner24.jpg

Call For Entries #24 | After 23 editions and more than 100 published photographers, our print edition has proven to be a simply effective promotional channel.

Being a child in a mundari camp by Elena Molina

Being a child in a mundari camp by Elena Molina

This project was selected and published in our print edition 19. Being a child in a Mundari camp is synonymous with working tirelessly from dawn to dusk. From their earliest age, they actively participate in the care of their livestock
Rohingya refugees by Joxe Inazio Kuesta

Rohingya refugees by Joxe Inazio Kuesta

We arrived at Teknaf, in the district of Cox's Bazar (Bangladesh) at noon, and that same afternoon we left for the refugee camps. It was raining, and the moto-rickshaw carrying us broke down halfway
Still lifes by Belén Argüeso

Still lifes by Belén Argüeso

More or less three years gave me my first camera ...... I'm not a professional photographer ... just a simple fan trying learn and improve every day,. I started taking pictures of my dog, and uploading them to a pet forum
An Aerial Wonderland by Graham Earnshaw

An Aerial Wonderland by Graham Earnshaw

Graham took a morning flight in a small Cessna over the coastline of the main township of Broome, in the hope of capturing some beautiful and unusual aerials over nearby Roebuck Bay and Willie Creek.
Stories Retold by Lukas Vasilikos

Stories Retold by Lukas Vasilikos

His influences from Henri Cartier-Bresson to André Kertész and from Garry Winogrand to Josef Koudelka and Roy De Carava, as well as from the great Greek photographers, older and contemporary such as Nikos Economopoulos, enrich the inspirations and form the photographic aesthetics of the new author.
Everyday life; Our summer stories by Kata Sedlak

Everyday life; Our summer stories by Kata Sedlak

The idea behind the photo series "Our summer stories" came to existence after my three-year break - the maternity leave.

Trending Stories

Interview with Pamela Garcia; Published in our print edition #04

Interview with Pamela Garcia; Published in our print edition #04

When it came in the mail I was never more excited, it’s truly a beautiful piece of art. I am very happy and honored to have been a part of such a magical magazine that celebrates the love and art of contemporary photography.
Interview with Marc Thirouin; Published in our print edition #05

Interview with Marc Thirouin; Published in our print edition #05

Marc Thirouin is a French photographer living between Paris and Oslo.After studying arts in Paris, he developed its own photographic world where poetic stories and staged images prevail
Subway; Metropolitan fragments by Giuseppe Cardoni

Subway; Metropolitan fragments by Giuseppe Cardoni

The environment is delimited, circumscribed of the subway, in the absence of the external landscape that often represents a container of memories.
Boxing club; Est 1884 by Krishna Mooroogen

Boxing club; Est 1884 by Krishna Mooroogen

Repton est 1884, is the oldest boxing club in London, a pillar of the Eastside community, supporting young athletes from deprived backgrounds for decades.
A journey through an ancient saga by Balarka Brahma

A journey through an ancient saga by Balarka Brahma

A city with rich history is still standing tall in modern India. A city, which is considered much older than history itself with ancient river ghats, narrow alleys, classical art and music, is a perfect symbolization of India’s rich culture.
Heidi Erdmann director of Erdmann Contemporary

Heidi Erdmann director of Erdmann Contemporary

It has been said that Erdmann Contemporary is difficult to pigeon hole. Perhaps because I have firm ideas of what I want, how I manage my gallery, and that I am involved in every step of the business.
Flyover Country by Lewis Ableidinger

Flyover Country by Lewis Ableidinger

Flyover Country, the moniker given to the middle part of America that so many people view as boring that it is simply flown over while going from one coast to the other, to places where much more interesting things happen.
Nexus by Elizabeth Koning

Nexus by Elizabeth Koning

A Scene from an Unknown enlightenment and Luminous Land. Noticing the details, light, shapes, colors, textures, people, trees and flowers. Everything around me looked bright and different.

Other Stories

stay in touch
Join our mailing list and we'll keep you up to date with all the latest stories, opportunities, calls and more.
We use Sendinblue as our marketing platform. By Clicking below to submit this form, you acknowledge that the information you provided will be transferred to Sendinblue for processing in accordance with their terms of use
We’d love to
Thank you for subscribing!
Submission
Dodho Magazine accepts submissions from emerging and professional photographers from around the world.
Their projects can be published among the best photographers and be viewed by the best professionals in the industry and thousands of photography enthusiasts. Dodho magazine reserves the right to accept or reject any submitted project. Due to the large number of presentations received daily and the need to treat them with the greatest respect and the time necessary for a correct interpretation our average response time is around 5/10 business days in the case of being accepted.
- Between 10/30 images of your best images, in case your project contains a greater number of images which are part of the same indivisible body of work will also be accepted. You must send the images in jpg format to 1200px and 72dpi and quality 9. (No borders or watermarks)
- A short biography along with your photograph. (It must be written in the third person)
- Title and full text of the project with a minimum length of 300 words. (Texts with lesser number of words will not be accepted)
This is the information you need to start preparing your project for its presentation
To send it, you must compress the folder in .ZIP format and use our Wetransfer channel specially dedicated to the reception of works. Links or projects in PDF format will not be accepted. All presentations are carefully reviewed based on their content and final quality of the project or portfolio. If your work is selected for publication in the online version, it will be communicated to you via email and subsequently it will be published.
Contact
How can we help? Got an idea or something you'd like share? Please use the adjacent form, or contact contact@dodho.com
Thank You. We will contact you as soon as possible.
Submission
Dodho Magazine accepts submissions from emerging and professional photographers from around the world.
Their projects can be published among the best photographers and be viewed by the best professionals in the industry and thousands of photography enthusiasts. Dodho magazine reserves the right to accept or reject any submitted project. Due to the large number of presentations received daily and the need to treat them with the greatest respect and the time necessary for a correct interpretation our average response time is around 5/10 business days in the case of being accepted. This is the information you need to start preparing your project for its presentation.
To send it, you must compress the folder in .ZIP format and use our Wetransfer channel specially dedicated to the reception of works. Links or projects in PDF format will not be accepted. All presentations are carefully reviewed based on their content and final quality of the project or portfolio. If your work is selected for publication in the online version, it will be communicated to you via email and subsequently it will be published.
Get in Touch
How can we help? Got an idea or something you'd like share? Please use the adjacent form, or contact contact@dodho.com
Thank You. We will contact you as soon as possible.